Haven't blogged for awhile so thought I would. Been working lots and feel like the days are eluding me. I'm into the third trimester of probably my last pregnancy ever so I should be enjoying every moment of the growth of this little lively miracle inside me. And I am amazed at this miracle but also....I'm busy...busy with the trivialities of life, i.e. laundry, household duties, worries of work, etc.
The real moments in my life that seem drenched with meaning and love are the ones spent with my husband and daughter and contemplating this new life inside. I come home from work to Ken and Miri peering out the window in our house waiting for me - I can't tell you how this makes me feel as I literally run to the door of my home. Home - Webster's definition- "1) a congenial environment, 2) a place of one's origin, 3) the social unit formed by a family living together." Definiton 2 is probably most how I feel about "home", however, home means far more than that (a place of belonging) to me. It is a place of complete freedom, a place of incredible love and support, and for me it is a place stripped of pretense and/or the temptation to be what one is not.
So I walk in the door and am greeted with the warmest, most enthusiastic greetings, kisses from Ken and Miri as Miri helps me strip off my coat, in many ways reminding me that I am home and it's time to strip away all the facades and worries of the day. I am home. And I realize that I could be anywhere with these two and I would still be home, always at home.
And now before you know it a new little one will join us. Sometimes I wonder how I'll love this one - fears come, will I love this one like my Ken and Miri. And quickly I think of how love is limitless, there is never a short supply of it- it just grows and grows and grows. Just like this little miracle inside, just like God's love, neverending always there and constant.
And this little one will belong just like the rest of us belong - it works. The pieces somehow just fit together. In this busyness in my life right now I am able to pause and see how really beautiful these moments are.
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3 comments:
Aw, sis. That's a nice post. You and Ken have created a really warm family for each other and for Miri and the new one on the way. It's nice to see.
what a beautiful picture-- to be so free with yourself, with your family! I hope that we can be such a refuge for each other in our home too.
Matt McKnight told me, just before Ezra was born, that just as he couldn't have beforehand imagined how much he'd love one child, he also couldn't imagine that love for two. Not being able to imagine either didn't change at all the reality of that love when they came. That was my experience, too.
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